Crystal Clear Communication 🔮

Imagine spending 20 years of your life studying to become a doctor. You memorize all the facts. You know all the treatments to improve someone’s health.

You studied for this. You want to help people.

Now your first patient walks into the room. They tell you their problem.

This is it.

You go into your brain and pull out all the relevant words. The necessary tests. The possible diagnoses. You have your suspicions. You rattle off all the things.

You slowly see their eyes glaze over. They stare down at their phone. They don’t even seem to be paying attention to you and your torrent of knowledge you are releasing.

After you stop to catch your breath, they ask,

“Can you just give me a pill or something?”

In so many walks of life, the gaining of knowledge is only one aspect of a profession. The second aspect is communicating that knowledge to others. If you aren’t a strong communicator, you cannot share with others the knowledge you have, nor convince them to consider listening to your perspective.

Taken a step further, poor communication can lead to dire consequences.

There are countless communication errors that have led to plane crashes because the knowledge of one party was not communicated clearly and precisely to the other party.

Because someone did not actually communicate a problem.

Because something presumed that the listener understood the situation already.

Because a situation was misinterpreted.

Because communication was not clear.

So what can we do?

1. Clearly Know What You want To Communicate

   If you are not clear about what you think or what you want to say, it can be downright impossible for others to know.

   Let’s say you need help from someone on an IKEA furniture build project and you are simply overwhelmed. They ask, “How can I help?”

   Do you ask them to simply be present by your side as you continue?

   Do you ask them to take over and continue to follow the directions starting on page 4?

   Do you ask them to hand you a tool that you cannot reach?

   Do you ask them to help you lift the furniture so you can hammer a nail on the bottom?

   If you cannot put into words how to help, it can be extremely hard for the helper to know how to support you.

2. Clearly Understand Your Audience

   Know who you are speaking to and how they listen. You speak to a 4 year old differently when compared to a 15 year old, a 50 year old, and an 80 year old. You know how to tailor your speech to people of differing ages. But what about people with differing educational backgrounds or different cultural experiences? What about a room of CEOs? What about a room of employees?

   Let’s say you are giving a talk in front of a niche group of mechanical keyboard builders at a local meetup. You are a physiotherapist and your talk is about the ergonomics of your hand and wrist position when typing. If you bust out your human biology, muscle, and health jargon, you can bet that lots of people will zone out.

   But if you relate your talk to what is important to them, their sitting position while they painstakingly solder away on their keyboard PCBs or consider 3D printing keyboard risers to support a neutral wrist position when typing, those things resonate more with your audience.

   Now you are speaking in a way that is relevant.

   And relevance translates to importance to them.

   And importance translates to active listening.

3. Be Concise

   People have a short attention span. Say what you need to say in the shortest, most straight-forward way. That’s how you communicate your ideas, waste no extra time, and respect your audience’s time.

   Let’s say you are a guest speaker at a conference. Everyone in attendance is a busy CEO running a business and they, in the hopes of taking their business to the next level, come to a conference to discuss pioneering and innovative technologies.

   Each speaker has 30 minutes to discuss their contributions and challenge CEOs to manage their businesses better. You instead spend 50 minutes instead of 30 minutes because you have so much to say. You talk about every aspect of your innovative technology. You talk about every scenario or situation in which it is useful.

   The trouble is...that you didn’t respect the audience’s time. They don’t need to know every scenario in which it is useful.

Out of all the pillars of clear communication, I think these 3 are key 🔑.

I think they are underrated because people don’t truly spend the time to evaluate these three pillars before they prepare for their presentation. They don’t take the time to sit down and go through it first to examine the foundation of their presentation.

The Paradox of Efficiency

Optimal Inefficiency is a term I have never heard about.

It is something Edward Tenner discusses in this TedTalk and it was an interesting opinion that some degree of inefficiency should be embraced, celebrated, acknowledged and desired.

The speaker goes on to highlight situations in which hindsight reveals one would have been better off with a bit of redundancy.

For example, Tenner discusses the popularity of the potato as a well-balanced food item. As the popularity of the potato spread across Europe, this monoculture dependency ravaged food production when a fungal disease spread and resulted in famine, particularly in Ireland.

Sure, in the short term, monoculture agriculture optimizes food production processes because the process of harvesting is solely honed for potatoes in this case, but it ultimately was detrimental to the sustainable longevity of food production.

Similarly, Tenner discusses the concept of electronic medical charting. Tenner claims that in the hopes of improving physician writing legibility and medical record-keeping, electronic medical charting was put forth. However, the need to maintain and update electronic medical charting has resulted in a reduction in face-to-face physician interactions, which at times can be deemed counterproductive in the grand scheme of things - since the intention is supposed to be to optimize patient care.

I think it’s a good reminder that some redundancy of tasks and celebration of optimal inefficiencies is important. You may not recognize in the moment the importance of certain inefficiencies but they can be vital to minimizing your risk exposure and you shouldn’t necessarily despise these inefficiencies as much as you want to.

For me, I always wish I could do things faster, better, with increased ease and with less friction. Sometimes, this hinders or limits my excitement or interest in doing tasks or taking on projects that are “a waste of my time” or inefficient projects.

That is the exact mindset that can leave me vulnerable to missing opportunities for growth and development.

So this TedTalk really resonated with me.

• That it is okay to be slow or take on inefficient work.

• That there are smart ways to accept and embrace and even celebrate slow grinding projects.

• That there may be some safety net that inefficiency builds into a system or project that you may not see at first glance.

So the next time something feels inefficient to you. Analyze it. Evaluate it. Maybe it’s there’s a positive or redundant safety net there. But don’t beat yourself up because the inefficiency exists. Grow with it.

Embarrassment.😳

I think on theoretical level, everyone conceptually understands that you cannot be amazing at everything in the very beginning.

People get it. It makes sense.

You are supposed to suck at something. You can’t possibly be good at everything you do (especially at first).

But knowing it and really being in the moment of ineptitude for others to see and judge is different.

In the moment, it sucks to suck at things.

It’s embarrassing.

But it shouldn’t be. It should be a normalized part of the process.

I wanted to share a recent instance that I’m not exactly proud of but at the time thankful I “overcame”.

The fact that I didn’t actually do anything special or profoundly productive is not lost on me but I thought it was worth celebrating because I did not remove myself from the uncomfortable situation, which meant I was pushing beyond my comfort zone.

I stayed in the moment of ineptitude. As sucky as that can be.

Now, productivity and efficiency are natural second-level or third-level considerations to aspire for. When you have some basic understanding of what to do, the path to doing it better is easier to seek or find.

But what do you do before that step? When you are figuring out anything and everything?

For me, this was woodworking.

I had never done woodworking before, but really wanted to pursue a craft that allowed me to via my own two hands, create something for myself.

I signed up for a woodworking class but was told by my future teacher that I could attend drop-in sessions before the class started to practice basic concepts.

So here I am, showing up to a woodworking drop-in session with no actual project, having held and used a saw to cut a handful of cuts and expected to make use of 2.5 hours productively.

Furthermore, there were 6 other people who were competent, making creative, beautiful pieces of furniture with their hands.

I spent about 20 minutes fumbling through my things, trying to look like I knew what I needed. I tried to check my phone like I was being distracted or had other things that consumed my time and that was why I wasn’t jumping into the craft immediately like a productive worker.

It was an embarrassing 20 minutes of time where I felt lost, judged, unproductive, inept, incompetent , and any other negative feeling you could think of.

I just wanted to go home; I just wanted to say that maybe today isn’t a good day and I should come back when the place is quieter.

I was so embarrassed.

But...how badly did I want to learn?

How badly did I want to grow?

And I think that single thought made me stay.

I knew I wanted to be accepted, I wanted to be better, and I wanted to commit my time towards this.

Sometimes, it is hard to connect being productive with taking a single step forward, but a single step forward is still progress.

“Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there some day.”

―A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

I am proud to say I stayed until the end of the drop-in session. It was definitely an uncomfortable 2.5 hours.

I didn’t do too much from an objective standpoint.

But I stayed,

I tried,

I chatted with people

and I got a little better.

I still suck relative to other people, but I improved compared with myself a couple hours earlier.

And sometimes, even that is a huge win.

I don’t think there was a huge revolutionary unlock for me. Instead, I think the thing that I took away from it, was that this was the worst I was going to be. And I managed to stay. And it should get better with each and every subsequent visit.

I think this relief that I survived the worst I’d feel about it minimizes the anxiety I feel about the whole situation.

In turn, I can now focus on the positive growth, the development and the skill acquisition.

Happiness and Productivity

What I Like.

So, today’s topic is happiness and where that fits into productivity. The way my brain works, I notice all the inefficiencies and areas for improvement.

It’s just what I like to think about and do.

Today, while grocery shopping with my wife and her family, I was already seeking the faster cashier to efficiently save time on paying while they were still discussing if there was anything else to buy.

For me, I enjoy and take pleasure in being productive and being efficient.

I like to go to bed knowing I made the most with my time today. That I took the best route. That I streamlined a process.

Now, “making the most” becomes a philosophical question about what you value and it certainly becomes a question highly dependent to your individual situation but I think it is a worthwhile exercise to explore and consciously contemplate.

What does making the most of your day look like?

What does making the most of your year look like?

What does making the most of your life look like?

Personally, as long as the health and safety of my family and friends is good, I enjoy using my brainpower and critical thinking to make work more efficient, generate creative solutions and answer complex questions. I enjoy being a role model, helper, leader, facilitator, educator, listener, follower, and whatever else my job needs me to be.

But Do I Actually Like It?

I am learning that not all people think that way.

Not all people want to be productive 24/7, to optimize their every waking moment, and some people don’t even have a second thought about proficiency because they’re simply enjoying the moment for what it’s worth.

Not all people see work as fun, or exciting, or something they want to do.

Not all people think in terms of optimizing efficiency, doing things faster, finding a better way.

That is totally okay and acceptable, but my mind always goes into problem-solving mode.

Why do they not like their job?

What can they control to make their job experience more enjoyable?

Why do I feel so differently or don’t seem to have these doubts or concerns?

Do I even actually like work myself?

I mean...I am trying to create a productivity blog space and write posts every Sunday.

Is that a big enough sign that I enjoy this stuff? (really, let me know what you think?)

But Do I Really? Maybe I’m Just Brainwashed.

Whether it is through TikTok, Reddit, Youtube, Books, or any other content medium, there is always an anti-work or anti-hustle group that raises genuine concerns about the capitalistic North American glorification of work.

I mean, there’s so many concerns already in North America with the idea of a liveable wage while simultaneously celebrating individuals who have enough capital to shoot themselves into space for fun.

Am I just brainwashed by The Man to think that I want this? I’ve just been so incepted that I cannot even see that isn’t my own thinking?

How does one tell whether you enjoy that existence?

I think it becomes a very personal discussion with yourself about whether you enjoy work.

I certainly acknowledge that I enjoy work more than your average person. I enjoy feeling accomplished over relaxed and enjoy feeling busy rather than free.

So...What Is the Alternative?

Would I be happier on the beach relaxing? Probably not. I’ve tried going to an all-inclusive resort with friends. Although fun, I felt restless with the lack of a schedule or list of things to accomplish.

Would I be happier with a less stressful job doing something monotonous or less engaging but getting paid the same amount? Probably not. Although I would love the idea of being paid the same for doing less work, I would want to use the time and mental energy saved to tackle even more or different problems. I wouldn’t enjoy settling into the role and accepting inefficiencies. Therefore, I’d seek out more authority or decision-making power to make those fixes and changes.

Is there something else that I’d prefer to do that would be equally challenging, pay me more and have less work? I personally see that possibility in entrepreneurship - first working harder and then once systems are in place and the right staff are hired to support the day-to-day, imagine the workload to be reduced.

So that’s why I’m trying this blog, trying to be comfortable with posting about my life and my interests, trying to see what resonates with me and whether it resonates with others.

Maybe 10 years down the road, it may become something bigger, but for now, it’s something that makes me feel a little more productive.

The Instant-Gratification Monkey 🐒

This is my recap of Tim Urban and the tale of the instant-gratification monkey, the deadline monster and the rationale decision-maker that all run our brains.

His story-telling, simplistic explanations and pacing made the lessons learned easily accessible to the audience and the topic of procrastination is universally relatable.

My take-aways from Tim Urban’s story is the necessity of deadlines.

In his story-telling, procrastination is a light-hearted, funny and silly fable of sorts but procrastination, as he alluded to, can also represent a burdensome, dreadful experience that haunts people.

Urban distinguishes between these two types of procrastinations based on the existence of a hard deadline - a date by which some resolution or alleviation of stress is achieved OR the lack of a hard deadline - in which case the individual suffers indefinitely and is never able to achieve relief.

That is simply why it is absolutely necessary to be truthful to yourself about your ambitions, your desires, and to pursue them with a fervid passion - so that you hold yourself accountable, decide for yourself hard deadlines, and stay the course.

It truly makes me appreciate and stand in awe particularly with athletes because their deadlines are so abstract and so non-linear. You would never be able to trace clearly the impact of healthy food choices, regular or adequate sleep, the extra benefit of 100 more free-throws at practice and yet these athletes have the mental fortitude to continue to do them. There is no hard deadline. There is no end date until they fully retire from their sport.

Like seriously. When you imagine an NBA player, they are already on a highest world stage. They have already dedicated years of their lives to get to that point. And yet, the distinguishing factor between them is the desire to win and the readiness to prioritize practice and skill development on a daily basis towards their craft.

And this insurmountable goal extends day after day, season after season, year after year until they retire in their 30s or 40s. But they practice the same shots, the same drills to be able to complete them effortlessly.

It is only through their own arbitrary deadline goal setting that they can continue to strive for perfection.

So, What Does This Mean For Your Average Joe?

I think there are 2 take-aways.

1. Be Strict.

Establish deadlines for yourself because you understand and are aware of your procrastinatory tendencies. You know you are going to avoid doing work if there are fun and relaxing options available. So, set a deadline for yourself and hold yourself accountable for this deadline - even if it’s a hard deadline you arbitrarily decided for yourself.

2. Understand And Audit Yourself.

It is only through introspective evaluation that Urban recognized his own patterns and could then translate them into a relatable story for the audience. It is a skill in itself to review your own habits and tendencies to then be able to authentically be critical of them.

Only YOU truly know the excuses, reasons, and explanations for why you can and cannot achieve something. Only YOU can determine if those reasons are legitimate or if they are procrastinatory justifications.

HOLD YOURSELF ACCOUNTABLE

TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR INSTANT-GRATIFICATION MONKEY

There is nothing wrong with seeking out instant-gratification.

But there is a time and place for it.

And you have the ability to assign or allocate time for it to do so in a healthy manner. If your entire day is instant-gratification, then it leans towards unhealthy but if you allot 2-3 hours a day for instant-gratification, short-term happiness, and a dopamine-hit then it is helpful for balance and mental health.

Going for a quick walk, getting a short hike or sunshine is good.

Building into your schedules these allotted times and also maintaining your ‘need to do’ duties with hard deadlines is the key to a successful longevity.

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Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to surf the internet for a vinyl record I want to buy. After all, I’ve completed my weekly arbitrary deadline for blogging. Looking back now, that momentum has carried me over 6 months of weekly blogging, so these arbitrary deadlines do an amazing wonder of compartmentalizing problems and tasks into shorter goals as well =)

50% Rule

While trying to learn how to draw (a completely different and unrelated topic), I was introduced to the concept of the 50% rule as defined by Uncomfortable (the author’s alias) at DrawABox.com here. I thought it resonated extremely well with more than just drawing and could be applied to any skills or talents people are pursuing across disciplines.

The 50% rule is simple. All of the time you spend on drawing is to be divided into two equal portions.

• One half will include anything and everything you do with the purpose of improving your skills. Coursework, exercises, studies, tutorials, etc.

• The other half is reserved only for drawing done for the sake of drawing. In other words, play. Experimentation, just throwing yourself at the page and giving yourself full freedom to just try, even though the result will likely turn out badly.

Another way of thinking about it is that every minute you spend on learning, should be matched with another minute spent on play. Every day does not have to be split so evenly (not everyone has hours to throw at drawing each day). You could alternatively spend one session learning, and the next session playing.

This rule is something most students hate, and struggle with immensely. Many will view the difficulty of it as being reason to ignore or skip it, so understand that you are not alone. Of course, many still have (and inevitably will) pushed forward without following this rule - and of those who ultimately did finish the course, they generally agree that ignoring the 50% rule was a critical mistake.

In my opinion, intentionally reserving time for the sake of fun and play make seem counterproductive but is necessary for the longevity of any longterm commitment to a craft. Whether it is drawing, photography, pottery, woodworking, piano playing, public speaking, or even accent modification, this notion of play resonated with me.

As someone who constantly tries to optimize productivity, push ahead, skip fun but seemingly unproductive exercises, this 50% rule is extremely hard for me. Why spend time playing when I can instead focus on the next lesson or the next skill so I can acquire those skills a day earlier?

Apparently, it helps acquire and develop skills that are less straightforwardly identified. I say apparently because I’m still in the learning and acquiring process. At this point in my life, I can’t say that I have many newish talents or skills apart from professional skills (which I therefore implement in a professional, consistent basis on a need-to-use timeline) and most of my hobby-based interests were initiated earlier on in my life.

As such, I don’t have many things I regularly try that I still suck at.

But drawing? Drawing, I suck at it.

Protecting time to simply have fun lowers the objective requirements and allows you to focus on enjoyment. Remember, you picked up a new hobby or decided to embark on a new skill acquisition because of your interest in it. So building in time to simply have fun and enjoy yourself is important for the overall longevity of your interest. If you simply are grinding for skill acquisition with no enjoyment of it, then why would anyone continue unless out of necessity. As such, that mentality will only get you so far.

For me, that was exactly my experience with piano. I disliked playing because I only played because my parents thought it would be good for me. Now as an adult, I wish I applied some time for enjoyment and fun because that would have probably produced more buy-in on my end as a kid and more interest into skills and talents that I gravitated towards like jazz piano, improvisation and so forth.

Instead, I stopped at grade 3 classical piano because I hated playing music I didn’t like with no real personal goal other than to appease my parents.

Uncomfortable (the website’s author) explains that the shift towards fun will build in protected time to help you process things you’ve learned in the objective-based activities and absorb them more fully.

By committing to a 50% rule that requires us to play allows us to cleanly separate work and play and allows us to do each whole-heartedly. It allows us to allocate resources in an intentional manner to focus cognitive resources when we need to focus on the theory or technique more intently, and then de-stress or wind down when those higher needs are not required so we can foster our passions and interest.

Implementation in Communication, Productivity, Accent Modification and Public Speaking

That level of intentional organization of time can be implemented across the board.

Reading for fun versus reading for knowledge acquisition (reading non-fiction versus fiction).

Improvisational piano playing versus theory implementation and/or specific chord use.

Leather-crafting for creating a new design for fun and/or experimentation versus leather-crafting a templated design for selling.

Accent practice for fun, to imitate a certain character, or for exploratory sound shaping versus accent practice for professional presentation.

What Resonates With Me?

For me, I think my take-away is that I need to protect and assign myself fun time. Fun time to try a certain technique. Fun time to try a feature of my camera. Fun time to draw for fun.

Not only do I think that it will help me relax (which would help recharge me) but it also helps me not worry about being “productive” all the time. It helps me still participate in the hobby on a regular basis, which increases my commitment to it which overall increases the chances that I’ll remain passionate and involved.

If I simply had hard challenges and skills that I wanted to learn and each session required so much cognitive focus to participate, I wouldn’t want to participate. This unfortunately is where I feel like I am at with self-taught programming.

I currently don’t have any level-appropriate programming goals for myself that are keeping me interested.

When I think about my accent modification consulting service for others, I don’t encourage ‘fun’ time. Maybe more ‘fun’ time would generate more client buy-in, more client interest, and more client participation because they enjoy exploring accents on a level that extends beyond professional settings.

Challenge for You

After reading this, what do you think? What are you willing to commit 50% of your time towards for fun?

Build and protect time for yourself.

50% of the time.

Make a conscious effort to enjoy the things you want to get better at.

It isn’t a race that you need to get better faster than anyone else.

You can still enjoy your hobbies and interests without being amazing at them.

And chances are, the more you enjoy your interests, the more long-term commitment you will have to it, which absolutely has an impact on your long-term growth.

Protected Time🛡️

What is Protected Time?

Ever find yourself running out of time?

Who am I kidding? Of course you have. Everyone has.

But have you ever audited your time - what you actually spend your 24 hours a day doing?

How much of that time is used like you intended?

How much of that time is wasted unintentionally?

How much of that time escapes without you even noticing?

In your busy life, there are always things that can fill your time.

There’s always more to do. More for your business. More for your family. More for your hobbies and interests.

There is ALWAYS more.

The problem is we don’t always have clear boundaries or clear intentions for our time.

Why is Protected Time Important?

It’s important to have boundaries in order to prioritize what is actually important to you.

If watching The Office over and over again on Netflix is important to you then it most definitely should be protected time.

But...

If watching The Office reruns is simply something to do when you’re bored and it isn’t actually a priority for you, then maybe it is time to re-evaluate what is important.

You need to protect what is important.

You need to be comfortable saying, “No” to things.

You need to be able to say, “No” to people you love, friends you cherish, and family you care for if you do in fact need to protect time for yourself.

It is important to design your life and protect your time.

Now, by no means am I saying you should always refuse your friends and family. That would communicate that they are not valuable or important in your life.

How Do You Protect Your Time?

Let me explain.

It’s okay for you to love, prioritize, and design your life with your family in mind, but it is important to set specific times for them.

Just like when it can be hard to spend every waking moment with your parents, you can decide and design for yourself a time when you prioritize and focus on your parents.

If you design for yourself a week when you spend Thursday nights with your parents, then it is okay for you to not spend time with them Tuesday night.

That is okay.

It is also okay to redesign your week so that you DO spend Tuesday night with your parents.

That is okay as well.

The main thing though is that you made an intentional decision to do so.

Only then, can you fully design your week into what you want to do and accomplish. And if that week you ended up spending more time with family and less time on your entrepreneurial goals, then that is the decision that you consciously made.

If the next week you need to focus on your entrepreneurial goals more and need to prioritize those aspects more, then you must be comfortable saying, “No” to your parents that week.

Only then will you be actively participating in and designing your life. Only then will be protecting your time.

And, I don’t think that breakdown of your time is the same for everyone. It is a subjective decision you make for yourself.

What I do think though is that it must be a conscious and intentional decision.

It should not be something that happens passively.

It should not be something that is decided for you by others.

It should not be something that you don’t willingly give.

You live your life for yourself and you make your intentions clear by your actions.

“Don't compromise yourself - you're all you have.”
― John Grisham, The Rainmaker

It’s Not Too Late! 🕢

People have a heavily skewed perception of time towards the early half of one’s life. There is a sense of your best years being early in your life.

Your first kiss.

Your marriage.

Your first big break.

Your first kid.

These are all accomplishments that people expect to happen in their 20s and 30s.

Nothing is ever truly noteworthy about your 40s, your 50s or your 60s. Just the coming of your kids’ kid. You becoming a grandparent - which is entirely out of your control. I think in terms of milestones, they are unfortunately too heavily weighted towards the earlier half of your life.

I THINK THAT SHOULD CHANGE.

SENSE OF WASTING TIME

There’s always a sense of wasting time. That we’re running out of time. That what any mistake in our life is time not worth spending or that we’ve wasted.

We’re always focused on efficiency with time.

Being quick, getting ahead, wasting time, being too late to do something, missing the boat.

Our relationship with time is always not having enough of it.

And because we see our life aspirations as limited to our 20s to 30s, we limit ourselves. Once those timelines are passed, we have to close those doors. Cause, we missed our chance.

I wish I studied X in school but it’s too late now.

I wish I did Y in my lifetime. I always wanted to do Y.

I’m too old now to pursue Z. I’m past my prime or don’t have the time to do Z

But why?

Why can’t you study X in school now?

Why can’t you pursue Y in your spare time?

Are you truly too old to pursue Z now despite being past your “prime”.

Time and time again, people are popping up to shatter those stereotypes and demonstrate that age is just a number and there are a lot of things you CAN do beyond your 30s. But they’re treated as anomalies rather than the norm and unfortunately, we still

Want to learn a new skill? Mike Boyd has an entire YouTube channel dedicated to learning new skills. Whether they actually are useful or not is debatable but cool, entertaining and a testament to the possibilities of the human mind and body - 100% facts.

If you want to change careers, why not?

It’s not too late. There’s no metaphorical boat that you’ve missed.

If there’s a chance it will bring you more happiness and fulfillment and you hate your job now, why not take that chance?

It’s never too late!

And it’s worth remarking that people exist out there who have done it - who have changed careers and accomplished amazing things in the process.

Sidney Frank and Grey Goose.

At 77 years old in 1997, Sidney Frank developed Grey Goose vodka with maître de chai François Thibault.

He was 77 years old.

Think about that.

He was creating, trying new things, taking risks, and pushing the envelope at the age of 77.

At 77 years old, most people are checking out. They’re relaxing. They’re retired. They’re taking it easy.

I think it’s so inspiring that he found something interesting enough to pursue into his 70s and 80s.

In 2004, Frank sold the company to Bacardi for over $2 billion. He became a billionaire in his 80s which was an apparent goal of his.

He ended up dying 2 years later at the age of 86 but he pursued something he was passionate about until the end of his life.

Vera Wang and Bridal Wear

Vera Wang worked at Vogue for 17 years as an editor. She worked at Ralph Lauren for 2 years afterwards. Then at 40, she resigned and became an independent bridal wear designer. At the age of 40.

Having graduated from college and worked for 7 or 8 years now, I already feel like a part of my identity is attached to my job. I can’t even imagine pursuing a different career or redefining my career.

So It Is Possible.

Pursuing something different, making a change, learning a new skill. All of it is possible.

I think we have to put into perspective how long we live and how much we can accomplish in that time.

Why does 4 years in college or university define the rest of our lives? It’s 4 years.

Why can’t we spend the next 4 years learning something different and having an entirely new and different career? Why are those 4 initial years cemented and rigidly representative of our lives and yet 4 additional years are not flexible enough to facilitate a change?

Why do we not celebrate and encourage each other as a society on changes in life later on for happiness or fulfilment.

Instead, we look at changing careers later on as fixing a screw-up, better late than never, or having wasted the earlier years.

Now, I know I’m definitely glossing over the financial, mental, emotional and physically-taxing aspects of making such a substantial change in one’s life. But I think it’s important to acknowledge the possibility and to also recognize that others have accomplished this feat as well. Their situations may not have been the same as yours or mine but they were able to and I think there’s value in realizing that potential rather than seeing it as a missed opportunity.

And I challenge you to look at what doors you’ve mentally closed because of some arbitrary decision and consider pursuing something that makes you happy in life, something that is fulfilling.

For me, it means that I have lots more time to figure out what I want to do and I have the breathing room to know I can be patient and try many things over the next several decades. I have a stable 8-4 job and then I get to pursue hobbies and interests on the side in an entrepreneurial capacity to grow and expand my skill set even if they have nothing to do with my current career.

It means that I can shift my perspective and be open to change, open to opportunities, and trust my gut when considering fun and exciting but unrelated skills.

Because who knows?

Jobs that didn’t exist 5-10 years ago, now exist.

Skills that were not valued are now extremely valuable.

The world is changing and I want to live a fulfilled and stimulating life in whatever capacity I can and my wants and needs can change from my wants and needs when I was in my 20s and 30s.

So….It’s never too late!

Failure To Launch…Yay?

I am a firm believer in failure.

Failing is good.

Failing is important.

Failing is normal.

Everyone fails at something. Everyone is bad at something. Everyone can get better.

But for whatever reason, we as a society don’t encourage failure enough.

We don’t celebrate it enough.

The older we get, the more afraid of failure and rejection we become and the more averse we are to it.

Jia Jiang discusses the fear of rejection and the pursuit of rejection over the course of 100 days.

He actually pursued rejection.

It’s such a backwards pursuit because we are constantly trying to escape rejection and failure.

We don’t like being told we are not good enough.

We don’t like being told, “No”.

We don’t like feeling like a beginner.

But because of that, there’s almost a societal shame associated with inexperience — which is complete unjustified.

Jia Jiang challenges that view with an authentic and straight-forward acknowledgement of the circumstances, the oddity of his requests, an acceptance of and almost embracing of rejection and is instead met with trust, acceptance and surprisingly, a helpfulness from others for his cause.

He is able to turn skeptics into believers. Turns critics into supporters.

He learns about the possibility of success in his requests, how to overcome the inner dialogue and doubt that we grow up learning, and minimize the anxiety surrounding rejection.

Personally, I still struggle with rejection. But it is something that I try to embrace - because I cognitively understand the benefit. It still is a visceral fear that I have to struggle with constantly in order to grow but I know that each rejection I get, every uncomfortable situation I find myself in will not be as bad as I think it is.

And if it is that bad, I’ll still gain something worthwhile by going through it.

Kinda like the hero character who has to go through his trials and tribulations before emerging with new skills and new perspectives to handle the problems better.

Heroes never immediately handle every obstacle perfectly. They need to fail, need to recognize their weakness, need to struggle and grow, and then finally come back to the trials and conquer them to reach new heights.

Similarly, you are protagonist of your own life. You have to face your struggles. You have to branch out and gain new skills or acquire new abilities to better adapt to the challenges you will face.

Embrace the struggle and the challenge as part of your main character quest. See it as part of your story arc and something that you will lead you to greater heights, more skills, and the potential to accomplish whatever you want.

Happy failing everyone!

Inertia 🏃

I love the idea of momentum, rhythm, deep work and pace. Once I’m in the zone, I can sit for hours, get lost in my work and can accomplish work that I am proud of.

The trouble, though, is getting in that zone.

Not getting distracted. Focusing for long enough on the task to get into a rhythm.

Cambridge Dictionary aptly defines Inertia simply as:

Inertia - the tendency not to change what is happening

As creatures of habit, we have a tendency to find our comforts, gravitate towards them, and to unconsciously stick to them.

I can drive my car to and from work largely without effort. I have my driving habits, my preferred routes, and I can do it on auto-pilot.

Same goes for my home routine after work. I can easily come home, get cleaned up, settle into comfy home clothes, and relax while surfing the internet.

The trouble comes when I want to be productive.

I need to fight those habits and tendencies, combat the auto-pilot and redirect my momentum towards productive work.

How Do I Do That?

For me, I have to avoid routines that facilitate sedentariness.

Changing one small thing can snowball into a huge compounding mechanism for change.

The things I have to avoid are...

• Sitting on the couch ❌

• Lying down ❌

• Getting too comfortable ❌

If I want to work, I love going to a library, going to a coffee shop or using the standing desk. Those simple changes in my routine are often enough to shift my automatic routines or habits for me to consciously begin working.

Those few moments of conscious work lead to starting.

Starting leads to a groove.

A groove leads to a flow.

And then BAM, flow state.

I know I’m skimming over a ton of things, but the point being that inertia can either work FOR you or AGAINST you in your quest for deliberate productivity.

It can become the hardest thing to muster the effort to get off the couch, stop watching television, and sit down to write.

It can also be the easiest thing to settle in nicely, start typing away, and 4 hours later, you’ve got a piece of content or work that you can be proud of and feel accomplished for.

The decisive moment though is that subtle fork in the road early on. The decision or lack of decision and subsequent autopilot habit to get cozy, sit on the couch and mindlessly watch something.

And it is still a battle. I still find myself zoning out, watching too much Youtube or Tiktok or going down the Reddit rabbit hole. But I am now more aware of those autopilot cues and signals where I need to muster the strength and will to veer away.

The good thing is that the more you do it, the easier it gets.

The more you recognize those crossroad moments, the better you can muster the willpower at the necessary times.

You begin to recognize the cues, the feelings, the sensations, the vulnerabilities, the moments of fatigue, your resilience and strength and all the extra little things that you can do.

And as you exercise these skills and muscles, you will find a deeper reservoir of strength and willpower to continue.

After all, you’ve got the momentum in your favour.

Celebrate Yourself

Do little things and celebrate them.

When I talked with my wife earlier this week, the topic of acknowledging and celebrating one’s accomplishments was brought up.

It can be extremely challenging in our busy-body lives to celebrate ourselves or take a moment to smell the roses, especially during COVID times. That’s why it’s crucial to stop, acknowledge and appreciate the growth and development we are fostering - that we ARE meeting our goals and doing meaningful work.

For me, time feels like it has stopped and everyone is waiting for the world to get back to ‘normal’.

COVID has paused my life and I am waiting patiently for my life to resume, for travel to resume, for safe socializing to resume.

I’ll exercise again when the pandemic’s done. I can’t use the gym right now anyways.

I’ll finish that home improvement project when lumber isn’t so expensive due to supply chain issues. Don’t want to pay a premium on supplies.

I’ll do that self-improvement project later. I just want to rest cause I’m so drained from work.

I have a rational excuse for pausing my life. After all it’s a global pandemic, who am I to disregard it or feel entitled to complain about the impact it’s having on my life?

Reading Darious Foroux’s article reminded me of 2 simple things. Besides all the productivity hacks, all the optimization techniques and the little efficiencies that can save you time, 2 simple rules can help.

1) Just do one thing, because one is non zero.

Accomplishing one thing can be the hardest part. That daunting feeling of so many things to do, so little time. Beating yourself up for all the things that didn’t happen today. Even if it’s 11:59PM, just do one thing. Because one is non zero.

2) Just start. Don’t think.

Don’t let your logical brain hijack your physical body. Sometimes, your mind is your worst enemy and is great at thinking of all the reasons why you will fail, why you can’t do something, why you should wait. Just start , think later, and realize you’re already doing it.

3) Celebrate your wins. Any win is a win and we take those.

The 3rd thing I wanted to add was to celebrate yourself.

Wins aren’t going to be pretty all the time. Sometimes you gotta grind it out and win by a hair’s breadth but a win is a win.

We can go about life always chasing that next thing, that next accomplishment, that next promotion but it can be exhausting and bring you towards that rat-race lifestyle.

I’ve learned that some people don’t always have the self-confidence to recognize their own accomplishments. Some people undercut themselves and humble themselves to the point of not even recognizing their skills, talents, competencies and impact on the world.

You should be confident and proud of your abilities and be able to recognize them in yourself.

Be intentional and pat yourself on the back for these moments.

But…celebrations don’t need to break the bank.

You don’t need to ball out and be lavish about it. You can celebrate in small ways.

It can be a nice relaxing night to yourself for self-care, it can be a nice meal with loved ones, or a drink with your best friends. The point is, it should be an intentional celebration to commemorate yourself - not an afterthought.

You celebrate others intentionally. You don’t say, “Oh we went out yesterday. That kinda was like a birthday meal”. So why sell yourself short that way? Celebrating yourself is part of the process of understanding your worth, understanding your progression, and being motivated to take that next step to bigger and better things. If you are unable to recognize your own growth and take the time to enjoy it, you will be stuck underselling yourself as something less that you are.

Your Anxious Voice.

...All Choked Up...

...A Lump In Your Throat...

...Voice Quivers...

In this TedTalk, Jackie Gartner-Schmidt, a Speech Language Pathologist, talks about her research on the voice and how feelings of anxiety manifest in your voice.

Productivity, confidence, and communication all go hand in hand for me. If I’m meeting my goals and ambitions, I feel confident about myself and my efforts. If I feel confident about what I’m doing, I am eager to share or communicate my thoughts about my specialty or industry.

I know I share this process of confidence building with many people but there’s a group of people who can be communicate confidently without productive work. There’s a group of people who exude confidence and communicate clearly without necessarily doing the work. There’s also another group who is extremely productive and effective but lack the confidence and communication skills to speak about the amazing work they’ve completed.

This TedTalk resonated with me because it bridges the gap of SLP work and public speaking.

People can be amazingly intelligent and competent individuals who are doing life-changing work. But there can be a disconnect between their work and their ability to talk about their work. There can be a disconnect in the way they let other people know about their work.

Gartner-Schmidt explains that from an evolutionary perspective, the vocal cords were initially a protective mechanism. Their primary function was to protect the airway, one of the tubes in your throat, from aspiration or the act of food/liquid entering the windpipe. They do this by being a gatekeeper and tightening up to close shut.

Only as a secondary feature have we as humans hijacked their original purpose of opening and closing for sound production and voice.

Gartner-Schmidt and colleagues have identified that high stress situations induce vocal cord closure or tension. Your throat is trying to protect you from choking in the only way it can - by tightening up your throat.

Now, this is great for protecting you from physical risk with choking but it backfires when you’re not in a physically stressful situation (like in mentally or emotionally stressful situations).

Interviews, presentations, high-stakes phone calls, pitches - your body can go into high-stress fight or flight mode and that includes your throat. Your vocal cords want to tighten up to protect you.

And this maladaptation is a shame for modern-day stressful situations. Nowadays, stressful, ‘fight-or-flight’ scenarios are less to do with running from predators and more about emotionally-stressful or high-performance interactions like speaking engagements.

“We want our voice to reflect the true us we want our voice to be congruent with our identity we want our voice to reflect our strengths not our weaknesses” - Jackie Gartner-Schmidt

This is why HOW we sound is so important. None of us want other people to know that we feel stressed or anxious. Feeling stressed is a natural process and an important part of knowing when stakes are high. But being stressed doesn’t take away from all the work and effort and knowledge you’ve put into your work.

Whereas before, when non-verbal communication, gestures, and physical charisma played bigger roles, in the height on our pandemic world, the voice is becoming an increasingly needed aspect.

Well, What Can We Do About It?

1. Gartner-Schmidt recommends one simple exercise.

Take out your finger and blow on your finger with a nice, steady airstream while ascending and descending in pitch. The demonstrated sound was similar to what you would imagine a cartoon ghost would sound like “ooooOOOOOooooo” . Do this five to ten times before you speak because this deceptively simple exercise essentially relaxes the vocal folds, it establishes breath and air flow and voice stability.

2. Another deceptively easy exercise would be to take a nice deep breath and yawn or sigh, imagining you’re stretched out on a poolside lounge chair.

We’re looking to reset your system, establish good breath support and relax your throat. An intentional 2 minutes focusing on you, your voice, and your tension can help prepare you.

So the next time you need you depend on your voice in a high-pressure situation, take 5 minutes to prepare.

Warm up your voice. Relax your shoulders. Calm your breathing. And Execute.

CUT THE WASTE - 6 TIPS TO RECLAIM YOUR TIME

We've all heard stories about how to lead a more productive life. Meditate. Wake up Before sunrise. Exercise Regularly. But what you may not know is that there are a lot of things we already do that we need to stop. That is, there are things that bog down, distract, and disrupt our flow states.

Unless you are a minimalist at heart or already extremely conscious of these struggles, I guarantee you can take away something here and apply it to your own situation.

1. Opt out of mailing lists.

Mailing lists and memberships are designed to keep you tethered to them. It can be difficult to opt out. But it takes mental strength and capacity to delete emails, clear your inbox, skip weeks in food prep delivery services and choose between looking at sales or not. This can distract you on a regular basis from what you truly want to pay attention to and your actual aspirations.

30 minutes later and you're down some rabbit hole shopping for a product you didn't even want because it's a good deal.

Do yourself a favour and just opt out. Your time is better spent bettering yourself and then paying full price later. Better yet, opt in later on when you want those discounts or coupons again.

Those companies will accept you later on with open arms just the same.

2. Reset your phone notifications lists every once and a while

Go into your phone settings and cancel ALL your notifications. Then, slowly add them back as you need them. Too many times, they seem to infiltrate our phone feeds until you are constantly bombarded with updates. UberEats, Tiktok, Instagram DMs, Email notifications, stock ticker updates, credit card apps. Be conscious about what apps are allowed to distract you from your current attention. Maybe those can be apps that only notify you at certain times, or can be checked at a certain time deliberately when you are ready to look.

3. Block Websites and Delete Apps

You know the ones. When you load up your computer and a website you regularly visit is automatically typed in without you even thinking just because of habit. Whether its Reddit, Facebook, Youtube, Porn sites, Instagram, Tiktok - they aren't always goal oriented and you can easily waste your time. There are tons of sites and ways to limit your access to these sites. Apps like Self Control, and Freedom help to keep you accountable to your own promises or intentions and focused on what you deem important.

Of course, things can change and things can come up that are worthy detractors. I'm not arguing that. But a majority of the time for me, these sites kill my momentum and by the time I realize what's going on and can muster the will power to try to get back on task, I've lost hours of time.

If you have an addiction or feel like you waste too much time, delete the apps for a while. You can always come back to them later if you must but the act of deleting them can act as a reset on the addiction and disconnect you from them for long enough to establish or replace them with healthier habits.

4. Have A Routine For Regular Events

You can always make time to do distracting but regular duties because it can sometimes be easier or a way to avoid doing what you said you would do. Instead of working on Task A, maybe I'll water my plants, clean the dishes, do some laundry, mop the floors...and if I'm mopping the floors, I better sweep first, or dust the shelves. There are lots of things we can trick ourselves to do. The better way to protect against this is to assign a date and time to do those regular chores. If Sunday at 4pm is time to mop the floors, then it can't be your excuse on Thursday at 6pm.

5. Television Should Be An Activity To Decide On

Instead of a default thing to do when you can't think of what to do, it should be a desired activity to enjoy. I'm not saying don't watch television but to be conscious of your choice to watch an episode of television. Again, Netflix, Amazon Prime and all the streaming services are designed to take your attention. That's why they start a new episode in the absence of a decision to stop.

6. 9PM Doesn't Have to Mean Stop

Now this one is for the people who want to do more. For all the people who like to wind down at 9PM and prefer that, then this isn't for you. For those of you who want to do more, 9PM isn't a must-stop time. You can continue to organize and work and be productive at this time if you want or prefer. It isn't a hard and fast rule for my wife or I but if we are in a flow state or feel particularly productive, working into the night can be a good experience to feel accomplished. This can include home goals, home projects, chores around the house, whatever you want. The point being if you feel like your productivity quits after you get home, it doesn't have to if you don't want it to.

And That's How You Can Take Back Your Time.

It's nothing grand or super secret. But sometimes it takes a third party to point out the obvious or it takes someone to spell it out aloud to truly have it resonate with your own life.

Sometimes, it may even seem trivial to gain back the 5 or 10 minutes you saved. The aspect of this that can’t truly be objectively measured though is the cognitive load involved. The extra juggling your brain has to endure unnecessarily to maintain focus on one task while you are interrupted or distracted with 5 other tasks, a phone vibration, a text, or another fleeting thought. Your mind can always run an extra mile a minute but it is only when your mind can focus on one specific thing at a time that you can truly focus your attention, energy, and productive self at a problem in order to solve it.

That's how I have slowly extended my productive life and how I will continue to work into 2022. Now it’s time to carve out some time to put at least one of these tips into practice soon. Commit to one and try it out. See what you can do with the extra time. Also, which of the approaches are you most excited to try first? Let me know by leaving a quick comment below.

2022 - Do Something About It. 💪

Happy New Year! It's 2022. Another year has come and gone and we're onto the next one.

Now....what comes next?

Well, whatever you want.

You've got a whole year now to manifest your desired life.

And if you need that societal justification or backing, you're in luck. This is the generally accepted time to reframe, re-evaluate, and plan out your year and your aspirations for your year.

Now, it isn't necessary to start this now nor is it necessary to wait until now to begin but, if you're here and wanting to do it now, it's a good starting point.

I personally hate the waiting until January to start but I do like the new start feel. So, take whatever parts of the new year help you to start and just go with it.

Get off your ass and do something about it.

New Years Resolutions And Me

I'll tell you the things I want to do this year and maybe that'll give you the confidence or inspiration to get yours.

Amongst my friends and I, we usually get together and chat about our goals for the year. Things we want to do, things we want to focus our energy on. Think of it as accountability with a little bit of social pressure. There's 7 pillars of our lives that we want to improve or target. This year, I want to try making it a bit more specific and keep myself a little more accountable so I'll try to flush out these larger ideas into more manageable goals.

Although I wouldn't say I'm super strict on myself, I figure I might as well flush them out as specifically as I can so I can make sure that I have clear ideas about if and when I have accomplished my goals. The more vague the goal, the more vague and self-sabotaging I can be - and we're all our own worst critic.

So here are the rules:

1. Make goals for 7 areas of your life.

   (i) Physical Health & Energy, (ii) Mindset/Emotional, (iii) Professional, (iv) Relationship/Partner, (v) Family/Friends, (vi) Financial/Income, and (vii) Free Time/Fun.

2. Decide on a guiding long-term goal and at least 1 short-term monthly goal

3. Monthly short-term goals must be written as SMART goals

4. The short term goals should be written as habits of do's and don'ts

Additional Considerations (Check out Mark Manson's post about habits here and Steve Schlafman's annual life review questions here for more details and the inspiration:

• Consider including keystone habits

• Evaluate what makes you happy, unhappy

• Evaluate what current skills will make you successful

• Who do you want to become?

What I will be aspiring to do this year

Here are mine.

PHYSICAL HEALTH & ENERGY

• OBJECTIVES: protect my shoulder, gain some healthy weight and muscle, develop improving aesthetic, proprioception, and confidence in moving through the world in my body

  • Long-term goals - do a muscle up, get better L-sits, learn a planche, develop insight into how my body feels (pain, tightness, relaxation)

  • 30 day goals

    1. Kris will complete 100 push ups, pull ups, or squats a day with 100% consistency for 30 days. Start there, and then increase as the habit becomes a little more routine.

    2. Kris will complete right shoulder rehabilitative exercises with 100% consistency for 30 days on a regular basis (every 2 days) with regular physio appointments for accountability and increasing difficulty.

MINDSET / EMOTIONAL

• OBJECTIVE: maintain stable and calm mindset. Be grounded but also grow in emotionality or ability to express emotions. Explore and improve my communication of emotion.

  • Long-term goals - become a more balanced person, consider the prophylactic benefits of therapy and counselling, handle irritability in a more constructive way

  • 30 day goals

    1. Kris will meditate for 5 minutes a day with 100% consistency for 30 days. Start there, and then increase duration as desired. No hard target for duration, but focus on regularity

    2. Kris will explore the benefits of prophylactic counselling/therapy with the intention to figure out what it can do for me. Whether that leads to something else will be determined but at least investigating it (via a 5-hour commitment of invested time), booking a session, etc. This will be completed via a tracked time-frame to monitor commitment of time.

PROFESSIONAL

• OBJECTIVES: Continue to grow in both my profession and my entrepreneurial tendencies. This growth can be in any aspect of my professional and/or entrepreneurial desires.

  • Long-term goals - Grow in confidence as a clinician/supervisor. Have attempted to pursue entrepreneurial opportunities despite the fear of losing time, effort, money.

    • >30 day goals include:

      • Kris will design/make/sell a physical product. This will extend over 30 days and as such won’t be reflected in the 30 day goals but should be recognized as a long-term goal.

      • Kris will have 2-3 regular clients throughout the year for accent modification services.

  • 30 day goals

    • Kris will complete 1 SLP-associated course every month with 100% consistency.

      • Specific niche areas can be pursued with increased intensity/attention as they arise (motor speech, transgender voice therapy, etc)

    • Kris will invest 5 hours of time per week in the pursuit of entrepreneurial goals. This can be related to learning, research, sales, marketing, design, etc.

RELATIONSHIP / PARTNER

• OBJECTIVES: Continue to grow and foster a developing relationship with my wife.

  • Long-term goals - Connect, reconnect and connect more deeply with my wife. This goal is an ever-growing, encompassing and never-accomplished goal. I think the pursuit of this is the entirety of the goal and the ‘achievement’ may never be reached but the intention and pursuit is the very aspiration I am trying to capture.

  • 30 day goals

    • Kris will write a note referencing 1 thing that was good into a jar every month with 100% consistency to capture a positive memory. This will be reviewed at the end of the year with his wife..

    • Kris will do something together with his wife to foster deeper insight into the relationship with his wife (via games, discussions, therapy) on a weekly basis. Some sort of scheduled regularity would facilitate increased routine frequency.

    • Kris will do something every day to communicate a sense of caring, love, admiration and adoration daily to his wife. It should be clear every single day that these feelings and thoughts are accompanied by action to both Kris and his partner so there are daily examples of love.

FAMILY / FRIENDS

• OBJECTIVES: Ensure that my friends and family feel connected and I feel connected to them. Friendships and relationships require time and effort to grow and maintain. With negligence they can die and although I may not have concerns with their sustainability with limited attention, that is not necessarily the case from the other's perspective. This growth should extend to my family, my friends, and fostering new relationships or connections

  • Long-term goals - Connect, reconnect and connect more deeply with the people in my life.

  • 30 day goals

    • Kris will reach out to 1 friend a week to try and foster at least 52 meaningful connections. Try to meet up or schedule a talk with them on a regular basis (+/- the challenges and reality of people's lives).

    • Kris will reach out to 1 family member a week for 52 meaningful interactions. Try to talk to them but if text-based interactions are the only means, then they are acceptable. Not because I value verbal over text but the time invested and attention in conversation tends to have a higher threshold of commitment and engagement.

FINANCIAL / INCOME

• OBJECTIVES: Automate and increase financial standing. Do so with a sense of excitement, optimism, energy, and hunger. Once it becomes a negative, draining, demoralizing experience, consider stopping. Have insight in the privileged position you are coming from, recognizing and accepting a healthy sense of greed and hunger but also acknowledging the humble beginnings and humility required to know you didn't arrive here alone.

  • Long-term goals - Increase investment contributions. Right now I'm at around 10% for safer, passive investments and dabbling with some more active investing on the side. I'd like to increase that to 15-20% and see how that effects my quality of life and budget a bit more.

  • 30 day goals

    • January - Kris will establish a blueprint for the year in terms of annual goals (based on percentages of income) and/or absolute value monetary numbers for savings and investments for reverse-engineering the needed budgets

    • Kris will make an extra $200 this month (above what is expected). He can do this by selling something, attaining a new client, reselling, doing transcription services, surveys, etc.

FREE TIME / FUN

• OBJECTIVES: Remember to have fun in life. Things don't always have to be done right or perfect. You have the tendency to want live life "the right way" and that sense of ethics, morality and duty leads to a self-sacrificing way of life that does no one any good and leaves you frustrated with all the "sacrificing" you do. No one is asking you to live this way and if it leaves you frustrated, it isn't something you are doing in good conscious or with the positive effect you put on a pedestal.

  • Long-term goals - Build fun into your schedule and routine. It should come naturally, should incorporate your other goals and as a result, be built-in to your life. Happiness and fun shouldn't be an extra, nor should it be on the opposite end of productivity so make sure those two aren't at odds.

  • 30 day goals:

    • Kris will spend 1 hour a day doing something photography related with 100% accuracy. It doesn't have to be taking photos every day but it should be in the pursuit of this interest. Reading about photography, practicing photography, shooting, anything that is related to exploring the craft of photography.

    • Kris will create and publish 1 video a month. It does or doesn't have to be related to business. The idea is the regularity of publishing should help you establish habits, routines, familiarity with the programs so you can do this regularly. It can be trip-related, story-telling related, accent mod related, etc.....but something. It can be of any length but the length should be explored or varied.

What I challenge you to do

I challenge you to spend some time this year doing an annual review or a 2022 action plan. Design the life you want. Don't let life happen to you.

Cause once you realize you have a primary, integral role in how your 2022 begins, looks, and ends, you step out of a back-seat role in what happens, take responsibility for how it looks and need to walk the walk.

I won't stand here and say I'm impervious to fault or laziness or am lecturing from a superior place. But I recognize that this is a start to me taking control of my life. And I hope you can do the same for yourself. I’ll also try to update my list regularly as I add or change monthly goals.

Happy 2022 and happy designing! I'd love to hear what you plan for yourself below!

Holiday Rest

Holiday Season.

The winter holidays is a weird time for me. I think there's a run up of last minute productivity before everything shuts down but also a sense of reduced output and acceptance of reduced output. People start checking out, and there's a free pass to lack of productiveness....cause you know.....Christmas.

You can't be as productive because the services and organizations that you rely on aren't being productive or have closed down for the season and as a result, things are kinda forced to close unanimously. Banks close so business or financial catch-up can't happen. Classes or courses aren't offered. Things shut down.

In North America, Christmas holidays is a big thing. It's cultural. Everyone kinda accepts it, embraces it, looks forward to it. The gift giving, the big gatherings, the loud festivities. To top it off, Vancouver decided to give us a white Christmas this year - no gloomy warm wet rain but rather a white wonderland and the subsequent white-knuckle car pile-ups that ensue.

It's certainly a time for reflection, retrospection and gratitude for everything that has come before. Albeit bittersweet and at times soured by the covid restrictions and such, I think it's important to mentally focus on the things to be grateful for and the things that will invigorate me.

Now, I know that the pandemic has been a mental and emotional burden on us. Our lives have been upended, disrupted, blindsided and done so in a seemingly unending cycle now with the Omicron variant. There certainly is a lot to complain and be frustrated with this year but there's no point in focusing on that.

So what do I have to be grateful for this year?

I have my safety, my health, my home, and my family.

I am warm, I have the means to a nice warm meal, and I have the cognitive function to think, read, write, and communicate with the world publicly through this.

Sure, there are lots of things that could be going way better for me, but I have the basics, I'm happy and I have people I care about in my life surrounding me (even if they aren't physically around right now).

To me, the holidays are a time for recharging.

I don't need to drain myself to 0% in order to recharge and if there is some time to recharge now, it can be productive.

Recharging is productive.

Relaxing is productive.

Resting is productive.

So it's important to build that time and space for yourself to have those things.

Going HAM at a project without time to reflect, relax, and be with family is a short-term solution and for the longevity aspect, it's important to have a sense of productive consistency and longevity.

It is only when you have the time to relax, reflect, appreciate that you can understand your situation and be grateful for what you have.

Your situation may not always be the "best" or the "most", and certainly can feel insignificant when you compare to those who you've deemed "doing better" than yourself, but it's worth remember and comparing yourself to only yourself from earlier this year. It will truly give you that sense of gratitude because you only know your own story - you don't know where others started or how far they've come.

So try to enjoy the family time and relax with them. Spend time with them. Make memories with them. Rest is productive in giving you perspective. You gain perspective on why you work so hard, why you wish to accomplish more and how far you've already come!

I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday rest and feels a little more energized to tackle the problems of tomorrow…tomorrow.

Seek Discomfort

Seek Discomfort.

Discomfort is important. I know it can be unpleasant, stressful, and something we innately want to avoid, but discomfort is something that is worth exploring and seeking out.

It pushes you forward, makes you grow, brings about a new and refreshing perspective and it can sometimes be helpful in discovering new talents, new interests, new ideas and develop your skills in areas that were previously not a priority.

Scott Myers talks about the concept of Getting Un-comfortable. He goes on to suggest some bizarre experimental scenarios.

• Take your laptop outside and write in the freezing cold.

• Start writing the instant you wake up. Don’t eat, don’t brush your teeth, don’t shower, don’t even pee — go straight to your writing station and write.

• Stay up for 24 hours straight, then start to write.

• If you typically write in silence, slap on some headphones, turn on whatever music you love, or even better hate, crank up the volume, and write.

Writing in the desert? Why not!?

Sometimes, we can get caught up in optimizing, having a routine, getting it down to a science that may not always work. Incorporating some change of pace, change of scenery or change in method can be good for you. When you have acquired some degree of mastery or advanced proficiency with a task, infusing some semblance of creative irregularity can be fruitful - Keith Jarrett found this out performing on a broken piano.

I know for myself, I have my likes and my dislikes; I have my comforts, my routines. For me, I'm experimenting with how I write these blogs - what research I do, how much I spend on each aspect of the writing process, and what interests me. I have my pre-set ideas, my schedules, but sometimes getting away from how things are normally done is worth trying — I'll keep you posted on what I find out. For you, is there something that needs spicing up? Your outlook on life? Your preferred lens for photography? Your preferred route to work or type of podcast you listen to? Anything and everything can be changed and maybe that change will shift your perspective ever so slightly.

And that shift in perspective might trickle into a little difference in response or reaction to something else down the road.

I didn't know where I would go with this piece but I think that's okay. I'm currently sitting with my sound-cancelling headphones in silence - no music playing - cause I typically always listen to music. My own thoughts are rushing and jumping a little more sporadically than normal.

But sometimes that can be good for the creative process.

There's an amazing Youtube Channel called Yes Theory that I believe embodies this and you can see the resilience, optimism, growth and maturity of these young creators pursuing their passions.

So I challenge you to try something different, something new too.

What will you say Yes to that you normally wouldn't?

What will you intentionally do to seek discomfort?

Because you might come out the other side knowing a little more about yourself.

110 Techniques of Communication - Boiled Down Summary

David JP Phillips touches on 5 presentation techniques out of 110 skills he thinks are critical for high performing public speakers. Now he only talks about several techniques instead of the entire 110 skill set (I assume in part so you purchase his course to find out more) but touches on some fundamental considerations worth discussing. I'll try to summarize what I got from it here and my thoughts.

Phillips talked about the following:

1. Keep Open body language - The intention during your presentation is to be warm, open, inviting, authentic and genuine. Body language can either support or oppose that. So be conscious with your arms, hands, shoulders, chest, feet and the messages they can communicate to an audience.

   There was actually another body language Ted Talk that discusses this specific thing as well by Amy Cuddy here.

2. Your Movement On Stage - Where and how you move on stage is important as well. It's something no one considers in your elementary school, high school or even university presentations but once you watch professional speakers at tech talks look like they're chatting in a Ikea display room, walking and space-taking become important.

   Moving forward, closer, towards your audience become meaningful subtleties which again, convey additional subtext.

3. Functional Gesture Use - Hand gestures and nonverbal cues should be functional. What that means is they should have inferred meaningful use - not just swinging your arms cause you heard you should use body language. So, counting with fingers to convey points of interest. Gesturing in an upward diagonal for growth or gesturing in a downward diagonal for diminishing value. No using gestures (no matter how subtle) if they are not intuitive.

4. Slow Your Pace - People need time to digest your points, think about what you say, and make connections. So especially when you're delivering that punch line, that important statement, the headline of your presentation. SLOW. DOWN. There's absolutely nothing wrong with it and although it can feel awkward speaking slowly if you are shy, unconfident, worried about clarity, and all the rest, it is in fact a powerful tool to command attention, attain confidence, and demand listening.

5. Hit Pause - Pause is powerful. You are okay with pauses elsewhere in your life, so why not a presentation. You pause to take breaks from video games. You pause your subscriptions or services when you are rethinking or reconsidering things. Pausing during your presentations gives people time to digest what you just said. It highlights or emphasizes the important bits of your presentation for you.

6. Silence Is the Better Time Filler Than "Ums" , "Eeh", & "Aah's" - When you fill empty space with sounds that are not functionally intentional for your presentation, you are filling empty space with irrelevant sound. When you replace it with silence, you give the interpretation that it was intentionally silent.

   Um , Eeh, and Aah are the verbal fidgeting we do when we are stressed, buying time, thinking still, or nervous. It's the equivalent of picking your nails or shaking your leg - not helpful. So, be intentional with stopping it. Sure, it won't be a quick or easy process. Sure, you'll still make mistakes, slip up, make those sounds when you didn't want to. But it doesn't make it any less important to try and do.

7. Look Up - It apparently lets the audience know you're thinking. Now, we’re not talking about straight up. We’re talking like at a 45 degree angle at a diagonal, looking off into the distance in thought kinda behavior. I interpreted this as communicating intentionality, presence in the moment and genuine connection with the audience. People can honestly memorize their presentations and not make genuine connection with an audience. But without authentic connection with your specific audience in the moment, it can feel fake, rehearsed, or "inorganic".

   Now I don't have experience with giving large stage presentations, but I imagine there are tidbits of information that support connecting with and reading the vibe of your audience. So having moments of authentic real-time thinking, adapting your talk as you go, and demonstration of listening (so your talk varies depending on the engagement and interaction of your audience) is the ultimate goal.

8. An Audible Inhale - Breathing is good. Breathing is a good moment for pause too. So having those audible breaths in is a good moment to incorporate pause and also communicate to the audience that something is coming up next. If you didn't have anything else to say, there wouldn't be a need for such an audible and deliberate breath in so the subtext is you have more to say and the listener should be ready to listen.

9. Smile With Your Eyes and Laugh - David Phillips talks about a Duchenne smile and the main distinction is the wrinkles in the corners of your eyes. It is considered a feature of authentic happiness whereas simply curling the corners of your lips or showing your teeth may simply be attributed to a polite smile or controlled smile. Once those eye creases are introduced, it tends to be a more genuine and authentic communicator of happiness.

   He also talks about an audible laughter which can communicate a punch line coming to the audience. Now, I imagine this would only work on a presentation where humour is used. It can be a little weird if you have a serious talk and then suddenly laugh if you are a serious person and not known for your humour in the workplace.

   The way I interpreted this was to be genuinely happy about the talk and the jokes or delivery. A presentation that I find funny or I find genuine is going to translate into smiling and laughter at my own slides. This will naturally lend itself to your delivery, lower your stress levels, and make for an overall more enjoyable experience for you as the presenter and for the audience.

My Take-Aways 🥡

What I imagine high level presentations to be are much more a choreographed dance or acting session in that, each pause, every intonational difference, each movement on the stage has an intentional purpose. If you go onto stage and wing it, hoping for the best, sure, there are some charismatic people that make it work (like Gary Vaynerchuk) but not everyone is like that. And so if you in your truest heart know you aren't like that, this can be a way for you to experience that same level of higher level success. So what do you have to lose? Time? Effort? What do you have to gain? Public speaking skills that can last you a lifetime of success?

For me, paying attention to my own presentations, how I use gestures intentionally and whether my delivery on my information would make me genuinely laugh or smile resonated. I think those are good guiding compass points for me to take a leap forward.

What about you?

Intentional Communicating

48 million people have viewed Julian Treasure's Ted Talk.

Julian Treasurer is a sound consultant and chair of the Sound Agency, a firm that advises worldwide businesses -- offices, retailers, airports -- on how to design sound in their physical spaces and communication. He asks us to pay attention to the sounds that surround us. How do they make us feel: productive, stressed, energized, acquisitive?

In his Ted Talk, "How to Speak So That People Want to Listen", he evaluates and reflects on the significance of the human voice, the faults and shortcomings that our communication skills can brung as well as the strengths and triumphs.

Here are the cardinal sins of speaking:

1. Gossip

2. Judging

3. Negativity

4. Complaining

5. Excuses

6. Exaggeration

7. Dogmatism

Now here are the 4 virtues:

1. Honesty

2. Authenticity

3. Integrity

4. Love

In addition, Julian discusses the qualities of the human voice and communication that can exemplify and more clearly and effectively impact our ability to connect with others.

• Falsetto

• Timbre

• Prosody

• Pace

• Pitch

• Volume

And then, he breaks out a standard vocal warm-up.

Finally, he summarizes the powerful construct that intentional communication, avoiding the sins and using the aforementioned skills alongside intentional active listening in spaces designed and augmented for acoustic communication can be transformative.

As a sound consultant, Julian is considering effective communication on the scale of corporations, stakeholders, and large-scale institutions. As a speech language pathologist and accent consultant, I think about speech and communication on a one-to-one basis. I imagine what can be done on a case by case basis about the delivery; the pronunciation changes that may result in a bigger impact; the most authentic communication of an idea that best reflects the speaker's desirer.

It's fascinating to imagine the perspective and impact Julian aspires to have on a company, a crowd of people, or the leaders of an industry for optimized communication. This sentiment is akin to the notion that ceiling height can impact our thinking. Rather than thinking about the specific word choice or delivery, even the physical space can impact our understanding and the thinking that our words can evoke.

What would the world be like if we were creating sound consciously and consuming sound consciously and designing all our environments consciously for sound? That would be a world that does sound beautiful, and one where understanding would be the norm, and that is an idea worth spreading.

In that same vein, I ask:

What Would The World Be Like If We Aspired To Communicate Clearly?

What would we focus on in our words to highlight to others? What would we overarticulate to ensure it was successfully received by others? How much would we prepare in order to ensure the ideas were clearly understood? Would we choose the largest, most pretentious words or would we choose the simplest words for the largest audience understanding? Would we focus on the grammaticality of our utterances or focus on the engagement and storytelling?

It can make you redirect your energy and attention to what truly matters in communication - transmitting your thoughts and ideas into the next person.

13 Micro-Habits to Jump-start Your Productivity

Habits can often define our automatized lives. What we do, the order we do them in, any unconscious action we take is a reflection of the habits we have and the habits we have speak to the kind of person we are.

Whether this was a passively unintentionally gained habit or an intentional, deliberate, designed act, our habits reflect who we are and ultimately can take on a huge portion of our lives.

Most of us have the habit of brushing our teeth when we wake up and before we go to bed.

With a 79-year average life span brushing at four minutes per day, that is 79 days throughout a person's lifetime.

Reading Jari Roomer's 12 micro-habits to increase daily productivity reminded me to be conscious about what I want my designed life to be and how I can get there. I really liked most of the micro-habits identified and have tried so there's definite overlap. Check out Jari Roomer's medium post here to read his.

1) Plan Your Day The Night Before

Proper planning gives you a goal, an expectation, and little room for detracting. The days were I've planned beforehand versus no planning are night and day. Without a plan, I struggle to be on time, assign a realistic list of targets to reach, and have feelings of guilt for a vague sense of productivity and accomplishment that I'm trying to achieve.

When I have a plan for the next day and a goal list, I can trust the process and trust my night-before self to have chosen a reasonably accomplishable schedule.

Using time-blocking, ranking to-do's based on importance and priority and following through with my schedule are all needed, but step #1 is planning.

Planning my day the night before instead of in the morning gives me a plan for the morning. By doing so, I know exactly what needs to be done from the moment I wake up — and I can focus all my energy on executing the plan instead of still having to make the plan.

2) Review Your Long-Term Goals Daily

Keep your long-term goals front of mind. Life is crazy, add in children or a global pandemic on top of work stresses, family dynamics and everything else and it can be down right impossible to remember your own aspirations clearly.

When you take the conscious efforts to review your long-term goals daily, you remind yourself what is important and it gives you perspective on your daily actions and whether your choices bring you closer or further away from those long-term goals you say you have.

Reviewing your long-term goals daily also primes you to intentionally design your days with your long term goals in mind.

3) Identify Your Top 3 Daily Targets

Pick 3 daily targets you want to achieve. 3 wins that you can get today to make today a successful, productive day. When you clearly identify your priorities, your entire day will be much more focused and purposeful. You'll also have 3 things to check off. Now,

So, before the workday begins, take one minute and ask yourself the following question:

Which 3 things, if achieved today, get me a big step closer to reaching my long-term goals?

You want 3 clear wins that will move the needle towards your long-term goals, not simply busy work or pushing papers. We want real, genuine meaningful success.

4) Drink 1 Glass of Water Right After Waking Up

When you wake up, your mouth is dry, you're still groggy and may not be ready to wake up, let alone be productive. It is important to immediately hydrate your body.

Drink at least 1 glass of water right after waking up. It'll definitely kick-start your day,

Sure, you'll want to pee a ton. And in the beginning, you might feel bloated or stuffed and you can't even have breakfast but it's good for you. It's a simple habit, and chances are you might be like me and get dehydrated throughout the day so getting an early victory.

5) Do A 5-Minute Daily Review

As part of my evening routine, I aspire to review the day's events. Now, I won't lie and say that I have this habit in the bag, but I can 100% recognize the value in reflection, acknowledgement of achievements and re-iterating to get my perfectly productive day.

Here are the key questions I've asked myself and influenced by Jari Roomer

• Did I accomplish my top 3 priorities of the day? If not, why not? What can I do differently tomorrow to ensure it is accomplished

• Which tasks occupied my time and energy, but didn’t lead to meaningful results?

• Which people and activities sparked the most energy and happiness today?

This 5-minute review keeps me growing. I am looking for optimizing even if I've done my day's schedule. And hopefully, it'll keep me growing and improving and working more efficiently for years to come!

6) Reach Out To Your Friends That You Admire

Admiration is a great attribute. I always find myself gravitating to people I admire and I become infatuated in figuring out why I am attracted to them and how I can gain their skills or attributes for myself.

What that means for me is to be deliberate with actively seeking out these people I admire. It'll allow me to grow in positive ways that I am designing for myself and I hopefully get inspired by them.

Remember, energy is infectious. The mindset and habits of the people you surround yourself with rub off. So design your mindset, habits and energy by surrounding yourself with people you wish to be like.

7) Start Your Days - Calmly

Something I've learned to do in the morning is wake up slowly and wake up calmly. I intentially wake up with time to spare, to make breakfast, to sit with a coffee, and sit in silence with my thoughts. I'm not a stickler for anti-phone use in the morning, but I do take my time to warm up, to be grateful for the day, and grateful for the day past.

Focus on your overall mission in the morning and what every day, every decision, every plan should or can do to bring you one step closer. The day will fill itself with busyness but you need to make sure you start your day with your head clear and your goals prioritized.

8) Use The Morning Strategically

Now, according to Jari Roomer, we should be using the morning for making and avoid meetings in order to do our best work. Jari recommends tasks that require maximum mental performance, willpower, and focus because your peak performance is in the morning. I'd argue that you need to know yourself and reflect about your long-term trends on your own. Sure, most people generally fit into that category, but it does require an honest reflection of yourself and your work.

If this fits you, strategically picking your creative time or intense focus times to align with your most productive mental performance time should produce your best work. If you are tired, fatigued, not yet awake, or in a brain fog, your work won't reflect your best performance.

Some would argue that if you are managing others, important meetings should in fact be scheduled during peak mental performance because the decision-making can have rippling effects on your entire organization; but if you are a creative or independent and the meetings are less impactful, perhaps those meetings should be in the afternoon instead.

9) Use The Afternoon For Logistics

So rather than describing it as "managing", I'd argue that afternoons should be for logistics - the day to day need-to-do's that perhaps aren't so mentally-draining. Answering emails, admin work, low-mental requirements but nevertheless important things to do daily. These can be those no-brainer filler tasks that are important but you can do while being distracted - kinda like washing the dishes, things that can pass the time and almost be meditative.

10)Disconnect During Focus Hours

Try your best to disconnect from your smartphone, your computer, or anything else that may detract from your focus time. Habits are important to us because they make us efficient. Our bodies can move without conscious effort because of these habits. We don't think about every step we take when we walk because we've become efficient movers but smartphones and technology hijack those habits and our neurochemicals. As a result, we can mindlessly scroll for hours, wind up down some YouTube rabbit hole or scroll through our favourite subreddits without meaning to.

If the goal for you is to intentionally spend your time on the things that move you closer to your aspirations, YouTube, subreddits and smartphones won't necessarily do that so make that conscious effort to protect yourself from these distractions.

I'm not saying smartphones are the devil but know that you won't die from disconnecting for 2-3 hours.

11) Have Fun

I emphatically support the idea of having fun. We're not going for some masochistic self-punishing, anti-fun, anti-phone, anti-freedom, scheduled regime here. But we are advocating for accountability to ourselves and our aspirations.

Things can 100% change, long-term goals can 100% change and if something no longer brings you joy, then you should definitely reflect and re-evaluate as needed.

The point being that if you have a personal conversation with yourself about your goals and you no longer have fun with your focused work, then that's something worth investigating.

I love working in a coffee shop and feeling like I'm making headway in my goals. I know I sacrifice social time with friends, mind-numbing vegging out on a couch with my wife and napping just cause I have nothing else to do, but I thoroughly enjoy making content, trying new things, and pushing myself.

So just make sure you do enjoy it. Plus, part of the whole scheduling your day habit is that you can build in dedicated time to do those very things when you want to.

12) Focus On The Growth

Perspective is important. I think depending on what you are aspiring to do, it is important to check your biases and have perspective because false narratives and negative talk has probably killed a lot of amazing ideas in the world.

It's always hard to start. It's always hard to acknowledge your successes and we are taught to think of all the what-if's that could go wrong.

Instead of thinking of what could go wrong, it's important to also spend time thinking about what could go right.

Start acknowledging how far you've come, how much you've learned already, and how much you can do as you gain skills. For whatever reason, there are a lot of biases to assume natural talent over perseverance. If you're a painter or musician, it's because of talent and not hard work. But every moment you are trying, you are persevering and you are focusing on your craft is a moment of growth.

So focus on that. Don't focus on the pain, the hurdles and challenges you anticipate along the way. Think of the growth you've already achieved and the growth you will continue to achieve.

13) Actions Matter More

Walk the way if you can talk the talk. Actions matter more than any hypothetical that you think. Don't just read, understand and forget. Implement what you learned even if you can't implement everything.

13 tips is too many? Pick one or two that you can implement starting today. Just do it. A company decided to and went from $877 million to $9.2 billion in the span of a 10-year campaign.

Negativity Always Works 100% of the Time

There's something inspiring about those that overcome tragedy and heartache that is worth exploring. Their ability to persevere despite the challenges, grow despite the setbacks and dissociate themselves from the negativity that can cripple and define others' existence reminds us of the capacity for humans to manifest their own thoughts and perceptions.

The ability for a human being to manifest what they wish to see is truly the unlock to the world.

With a focus on an internal locus of control, this mindset ultimately empowers you to accomplish.

Life happens to all of us. Russell Wilson reminds us that it happens to everyone. You can't stop it from happening. You can't necessarily predict how it will happen but certainly there will be events that do not end in your favour.

You can live in the moment and focus on what needs to happen today. You can't prevent what happened yesterday. You can't worry about the things you did or didn't do before. You can only respond to the present and control how it affects you physically, emotionally and mentally now.

For me, it means that I can't worry about how unproductive I was yesterday. How I didn't accomplish all my to-do's on my list.

How I should've been better or predicted that bad outcome or prepared better when I had the chance. Those regrets are now no longer within my control.

I can only move one foot in front of the next to keep walking.

So for me, I can't worry about the photos I didn't take yesterday while the lighting conditions were good or think about all the time I wasted resting after work instead of writing my next blogpost. All I can do is focus on the blogpost I'm writing right now and making it the best blogpost I can.

Now I know I am blessed. I haven't experienced the tragedy or pressures of a professional sports player. I haven't had anyone in my immediate family pass away. I have a stable job, worked throughout the COVID pandemic and have love and friendship in my life. All of these things can be taken away from me in the blink of an eye. And so, all I can do is take one step at a time, enjoy the process, appreciate the moment and continue what I want to do in life.

I think it's a powerful thought to recognize negativity works 100% of the time.

If you accept negativity, it is super effective.

So, it will work against you if you allow it to. Hence, why it is important to have a game plan, focus on today, focus on what you can do one step at a time, and execute on those small things.

Because the overwhelming fact of life is negativity will happen, bad things happen in life, and how you react to them and push past them IS the variable.