Embrace Short-Term Discomfort

Winter is here in Canada and even though Vancouver winters are milder, all I want to do is hibernate under a blanket.

It’s a reminder for me that I have to intentionally and willfully resist my desire to seek comfort.

We’re hardwired to seek comfort, to be pain-free, to run away from the uncomfortable.

The issue is always seeking comfort can ultimately self-sabotage long-term plans for comfort because we are prioritizing short-term relief.

It makes sense during earlier days. You escape harsh winters when freezing to death was a concern. Because if you didn’t survive the winter season, you wouldn’t have a long-term future. So, short-term comfort seeking was a necessity.

Nowadays, many of us who have the luxury of a stable home, source of food, stable job don’t have those concerns with basic needs and instead can plan for the long-term.

But we still choose short-term comfort.

Brianna Wiest talks about this Knowing-Doing Gap coined by Jeffrey Pfeffer and Robert Sutton in “the Knowing-Doing Gap: why we Avoid Doing What’s Best For Us, and how to Conquer Resistance For Good” essay in 101 Essays That Will Change The Way You Think.

We know that working out regularly, eating better, waking up early, choosing affirmative thoughts and such are all good for us. Common sense tells us these things. But we choose otherwise. We choose to eat junk food, we choose to laze around.

But we must focus our mindset on the discomfort we will face if we don’t do the thing in front of you, as opposed to the discomfort you will face if we do.

Let me explain how I understand it.

We must take action and pursue how we want to live.

The knowing-doing gap if left unchecked or unaddressed will only widen the chasm of what we intellectually know we actually want and what we decidedly remain inadequate at.

That understanding that we are constantly not achieving what we intellectually want will cause great stress because we time and again self-sabotage. Recognizing the autonomy we have in the decision only further exemplifies the self-criticism and guilt we have for our self-sabotaging way, leaving us as Brianna Wiest says, “a shell of the person you intended to be”.

You have to take control for yourself, and you can do so by considering the big picture. The alternative. The way your life will be if you don’t do this thing.

Of course it is uncomfortable to work, to push ourselves beyond our current capacity of tolerance, to be vulnerable to new experiences. Even more so now with social media where our curated version of ourselves is on display.

But it is important to do the things we want to do, even when they are uncomfortable. Most things aren’t as hard or as trying as we chalk them up to be. Taking small steps will remind you that this is true. It will soothe you in a way that just thinking about taking action never will. It’s easier to act your way into a new way of thinking rather than think your way into a new way of acting, so do one little thing today and let the momentum build.

So do 5 minutes of whatever it is you theoretically want.

5 minutes to break your comfort barrier.

5 minutes to realize “it isn’t so bad”.

Whether that’s 5 minutes of exercise when it’s cold.

5 minutes of whatever study you want to learn.

5 minutes of discomfort which can have the momentum to get you past your resistance of discomfort.

For me, the biggest obstacle is exercising right now. I just fall asleep under a blanket on the couch. I feel cold and sedentary. And exercising in shorts and a t-shirt sounds like such an uncomfortable experience when I’ve found a cozy space.

And I have to realize it’s okay to be cold. It’s okay to want warmth. Put on a sweater. Start working out. You’ll warm up and end up exercising. You’ll accomplish something you wish to do.

Now I know I will continue to struggle perpetually with this. Winter always comes around. Feelings of cold aren’t suddenly going to disappear. But it’s the fact that cold is temporary, that the discomfort is temporary, and that the long-term goal of regular exercise for my health and well-being is consistently worth that discomfort.

That’s what matters.